On top of the hour (compulsive my behaviour)
I see my life through sky news (keeping things in order)
Keep on watching things unfolding on my wide-screen set
Can’t contain myself
I’m going pay-per-view

Think I’ll explode (in the corner of my room)
If I do too much gak (sits my one big eyeball)
It’s with the advent of this pay-per-view
Can’t control myself

I scratch my knee
I have to scratch the other
Documentaries are the best

Thru’ my tv, through my tv
All my problems come
Thru’ my tv, through my tv
All my problems come

I study quite hard (in the corner of my room)
When I should be in bed (sits my one big eyeball)
I’m in the open university
Constant imprint of the test card on my eyes
I think I should rest (compulsive my behaviour)
Sleep on one side and the other (keeping things in order)
Always searching for the abilene
Can’t control myself